The Re-Independence of Patty

So, I had always thought of myself as a very independent person. I never had a boyfriend growing up, in middle school, high school or even college. This "freedom" definitely allowed me to schedule my own time however I saw fit and with really no concerns or regard for anyone.

Now, I don't mean for that to sound callus, and I also don't mean to insinuate that people that had boyfriends weren't independent, I am just reflecting here.

A "have"....................

I always considered myself lucky and grateful. Knowing I never necessarily "deserved" what I had and could just have easily been born anywhere. I guess while I always knew this and knew I never deserved anything I had, I was always truly grateful for what I did have. Not that I haven't worked hard for where I am, but I had no control over where I began.

I have to admit that living through Sandy has been challenging for reasons I never imagined. I feel ridiculously guilty for sitting here on Friday evening, watching the NBC concert in my electricity-filled apartment, after recently purchasing pizza and wine from our local pizzeria and wine shop. I was able to take a subway, or bus if I wanted and never suffered any type of flood or property damage and kept our electricity and hot water for the entire storm!

Umbrellas

I truly look forward to this post, in large part because it is meant to be a very lighthearted one. My recent blog posts have been very real and raw. I have opened myself up in new ways and it has all been a bit scary and a bit freeing, all at the same time. As the title shows you, this isn't a deep post. We shall see how this all goes as I try to type with an ice pack on my wounded robo-cop type hand.

There are so many wonderful things about NYC, many of which I have already addressed in past posts. There is one aspect of NYC living that I am not sure many realize. Growing up in a small town, we would drive pretty much everywhere, aside from walking or running around the loop and on the field, court or diamond. If we needed to pick something up at CVS, we would drive, if we wanted to get groceries, we would drive. I am sure I owned an umbrella in high school and college, but I don't particularly remember owning one. I always knew I never had to walk further than the distance from the car door to the front door of wherever I was headed. I never needed to really worry about the weather, except for the excitement that would come along with possible snow days and those freezing field hockey and softball games that would occur in the rain and cold.

I disappoint myself....

I have really been attempting to stay true to the inspiration. Meaning, when I get an idea for a blog, I write it down/text or e-mail it to myself and then add it to the long list of "topics" I want to discuss, at some point in time. I have been trying to stay true in keeping the order in which things come to me. For the first time, I am breaking order and I am going to write about an experience I had last night.

I am really nervous about writing this blog, as it is almost like holding up a mirror to myself and seeing things that I really do not like that really make me nervous and honestly make me quite embarrassed.

Math, science and sneakers

Well, this is the part where I mention the name of my blog in a post, so stay tuned.

Since the moment I moved to NYC I felt like I just did not fit into the stereotypical NYC mold. I did not align with the vision of a NYer you get when you close your eyes.

I often find myself walking around the city in awe. It still takes me a moment to truly believe that I live here. Apparently for good reason as I still run into people from my past who also get a very confused look on their faces when I say that I live in NYC. "You mean, in the city, the city?" I always reply with a resounding and apparently shocking "Yes! in Manhattan!" I am not totally sure for the reasoning for people's confusion, but I think part of it is that I grew up in a fairly small town in MA and the other part is just because the person I "was", growing up in that small town. I believe I even got the infamous "out of everyone, I never imagined YOU would end up in NYC!"

I am honestly amused by all of this and it makes me feel a little proud that at least I am still able to surprise people.